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I regularly receive questions about the difference between sex and sexuality. In some cultures, people are only familiar with the term 'sex'. Sexuality is basically 'ignored'. ‘Sex’ is explained as 'coition', 'having sex', or 'intercourse between a man and a woman'. In the African culture, which is the one I grew up in, as well as in the Asian culture, there is no difference between the words sex and sexuality.
In the Arab and Somali dictionary, the definition of both words is the same: they both mean 'having sex', or 'coition', and their only purpose is procreation.
At a more general level, sex is defined as ‘any behaviour, by one or more individuals, that is geared towards the satisfaction of sexual desire, which is determined at an individual level and on the basis of values and experiences’.
Sexuality has several dimensions. The personality, development, education and beliefs of an individual, as well as the cultural, social and religious context he grew up in are the most important.
The definition of sexuality depends on the context in which biological, social-psychological and relational aspects influence each other. These, in turn, shape the vision and perception of an individual.
Sexuality and sexual behaviour are a growth process. Our perception of sex develops over time and is influenced by our surroundings, beliefs and our psychological development. In the Netherlands and in other western countries, views on sex and sexuality have changed a great deal since the seventies. Much progress has been made. Despite the progress, however, I have noticed that sexology as a profession is sometimes ignored or disregarded. For many social workers, sex and sexuality are still very difficult and sensitive terms; subjects they prefer not to have to consider as a priority when analysing certain disorders.
Furthermore, clients often find it difficult to talk about sex and sexuality as well.
As a physician and a sexologist, I would like to break certain taboos around sex and sexuality in a scientific way, by means of the bio-psycho-social model, by offering appropriate and accessible guidance and treatment, using the sexual response cycle and cognitive behavioural therapies, and intelligible language.